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“10 Thoughtful Reader Reflections on Friendship | Cup of Jo”

"10 Thoughtful Reader Reflections on Friendship | Cup of Jo"

Have you had a chance to read Kate Baer’s latest poem, The Bridesmaid’s Speech? It serves as a tribute to friendship. Is there anything stronger than a friend who becomes family? I think not, dear reader. Here are ten comments from readers on this topic…

On unique gatherings:

“I participated in a PowerPoint party, and it was a riot. Presentations ranged from awful ’80s movies to Phil Collins’ fascination with the Alamo (it’s true! He authored a book!). We enjoyed ourselves and learned quite a bit; it was a fantastic way to spend a winter weekend in the Midwest.” — Blythe

“My six nearest friends and I posed for a formal studio portrait — outfits matched and everything! The (very understanding) photographer allowed us to embrace our quirky selves and even held up a photo of one friend who couldn’t join us. I highly recommend capturing and displaying the essence of true friendship.” — MRM

“During quarantine, four of us (residing in Salt Lake, Zurich, and London) initiated a Marco Polo chat where we casually showcased areas of our homes — like bathrooms, kitchens, and bedside tables. I cherished glimpsing these facets of my friends’ lives. What matters to them resonates with me.” — Tanner

On unexpected connections:

“When my sister and I were kids, all the neighborhood children were intimidated by an elderly couple across the street — Rowland seemed grumpy while Nancy had health problems. I can’t recall how it happened, but my sister and I became friends with them, visiting multiple times a week. Rowland was the sweetest, and Nancy would have made a wonderful mom. They gifted us Dum-Dums, allowed us to play in their backyard, and gave us each $5 for Christmas. They’ve both passed now, and every time I see a Dum-Dum, I think of them. I hope to be a cool old person to a young neighbor one day.” — Margie

“My adult son, Wallace, is a beloved figure in our mid-sized city. He has developmental disabilities, and he’s the most cheerful, inviting ’12-year-old’ trapped in a 25-year-old body! We could be anywhere — at a mall, a hardware store, or in a different part of town — and suddenly, someone waves, calls out, or smiles at him. Wallace beams back and erupts with an excited ‘Hey!’ When I inquire about who it was, he replies, ‘My friend.’ I realize he may not remember their names, but he’s the kind of familiar face that brightens everyone’s day.” — Jo

On family-like connections:

“My closest friends now have children, and I’ve joyfully embraced the role of fun aunt. This summer, it involved attending my friends’ kids’ athletic events. It was enjoyable to have a regular commitment for six weeks, and when the kids played on the field, we got to interact as adults! And six-year-olds playing t-ball? Just precious.” — Amy

On mutual support:

“I’m quite disorganized (I’m neuro-spicy, and the struggles with executive functioning are REAL), yet I’m also an extroverted stay-at-home parent. As a result, I often crave adult interaction but feel embarrassed about my messy home. Recently, I replied to a neighbor’s text with ‘yeah I haven’t done [thing we were discussing] because I’m in a depression hole.’ Let me tell you, my hair was so dirty it was probably combustible, I was in an oversized, ancient T-shirt without a bra, and my partner was away for work, leaving me to juggle parenting and adulting alone. We were practically wild. Twenty minutes after I sent that message, my neighbor arrived with a cupcake. This was *not* a scenario where my former self would have opened the door. But I took a deep breath, did, and this new friend embraced me, shared that she understood, and asked if she could tidy my kitchen while I took a shower. I sobbed with gratitude during that shower, and when I emerged, my kitchen sparkled and the kids had snacks. If you’re hesitant to let people see beyond your polished exterior, perhaps give that fear a little push. There are truly beautiful experiences awaiting on the other side.” — Kara

On expressing love:

“I once spent time with a new friend and had an amazing experience. I felt compelled to say ‘love you!’ when we departed but worried it might make her uncomfortable. To my surprise, she beat me to it: ‘Love you, see you soon!’ I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face for the rest of the day. So, here’s a lesson: the world can be unkind and unpredictable, and if a simple ‘love you’ from a new friend had such a positive impact on my day, imagine how much sweeter life could be if we all expressed it more.” — Claire

On friendships evolving into soulmates:

“My best friend and I have shared a bond since we occupied a dorm room together 15 years ago. Now living in different states, I sometimes long for casual cookie exchanges or running silly errands together, or just enjoying old Disney Channel movies. Yet, whenever we catch up on the phone or reunite, it’s as if no time has passed. More than my husband or my mother, she understands me. We jest that we are soulmates, and we genuinely mean it.” — Rebekah

“We were both nine years old when my family relocated to the area, and I was feeling nostalgic for my old friends. My mom took me to a field to fly kites, and soon another mom and her daughter joined us. Before I knew it, the girl and I were off running, leaving our moms with the kites. Now, at 80 years old, with her being 79 and a half, we have walked through life together, sharing joys and sorrows. I can’t imagine who I’d be without her, nor can she. It’s simply remarkable.” — Barbara

What friendship stories would you contribute? We’d love to know.

P.S. Guidelines for navigating friendships with disabled individuals, along with easy dinner ideas for hosting friends.

(Photo credited to Somebody Somewhere.)

**10 Thought-Provoking Reader Comments on Friendship | Cup of Jo**

Friendship ranks among the most cherished and intricate relationships we encounter throughout our lives. It can be a source of joy, comfort, and assistance, yet it can also pose challenges as we navigate growth and change. On the well-known lifestyle blog *Cup of Jo*, readers frequently share their unique insights and experiences on a multitude of topics, including friendship. Here, we’ve compiled 10 thought-provoking reader comments from *Cup of Jo* that offer valuable insights, humor, and heartfelt contemplations on the essence of friendship.

### 1. **The Value of Low-Maintenance Friendships**
_”One of my dearest friends is located on the opposite side of the country, and we connect just a few times each year. Yet, every interaction feels as if no time has lapsed. I believe that the best friendships require minimal upkeep — they just flow effortlessly.”_
— *Sarah*

This commentary illustrates the charm of low-maintenance friendships, where the bond remains robust despite sporadic communication. It serves as a reminder that genuine friendship doesn’t always necessitate constant engagement; sometimes, the tie is so profound that it surpasses time and distance.

### 2. **Friendship Through Life’s Seasons**
_”I’ve realized that friendships come and go, mirroring the changing seasons. Certain friends appear for specific chapters in your life, while others stay for the entire narrative. And that’s perfectly fine.”_
— *Emily*

Emily’s reflection addresses the fluctuating nature of friendships. As we journey through various life phases — from education to careers, relationships, and family life — our social connections may transform. Some friends may drift away, while others will remain loyal. Embracing these transitions with acceptance is vital.

### 3. **The Strength of Vulnerability**
_”The best relationships allow you to be your authentic, imperfect self. There’s no need to keep up a façade or pretend everything is perfect. Vulnerability is what enriches friendships.”_
— *Jessica*

Jessica’s sentiment underscores the significance of vulnerability in cultivating deep, meaningful friendships. By being open and genuine with our friends, we establish spaces for authentic connection and mutual support.

### 4. **Friendship as a Lifeline**
_”Following my divorce, my friends became more crucial to me than ever. They were my anchor during one of the toughest periods of my life. I will never forget how they came through for me.”_
— *Megan*

Megan’s story highlights how friendships can serve as vital sources of support during life’s most challenging episodes. Whether dealing with a breakup, grief, or personal struggles, friends often supply the emotional resilience required to navigate difficult times.

### 5. **The Delight of Shared Traditions**
_”My best friend and I have a weekly phone call every Sunday night. It’s our little tradition, and regardless of how hectic life gets, we always set aside time for it. Though it seems small, it strengthens our bond.”_
— *Rachel*

Rachel’s commentary emphasizes the importance of shared traditions in sustaining friendships. Be it a weekly phone chat, a monthly dinner, or an annual getaway, these routines help friends maintain connections while creating lasting memories.

### 6. **The Difficulty of Adult Friendships**
_”Making friends as an adult can be challenging! I relocated to a new city in my thirties and found it incredibly tough to meet new people. However, I’ve come to understand that it requires time and effort, and sometimes you just need to initiate the first move.”_
— *Anna*

Anna’s insight addresses a common struggle: forging new friendships in adulthood. Many people find it hard to build new relationships outside of educational or professional environments, yet Anna’s reminder to be proactive and patient is a reassuring message that solid friendships take time to establish.

### 7. **The Joy of Cross-Generational Friendships**
_”One of my dearest friends is 20 years older than me, and I’ve gained so much wisdom from her. Our bond demonstrates that age isn’t a barrier to forming meaningful connections.”_
— *Laura*

Laura’s reflection celebrates the benefits of intergenerational friendships. These alliances can provide unique insights and knowledge, and they remind us that friendship is not confined to age brackets or life stages.

### 8. **Releasing Toxic Friendships**
_”It took a considerable amount of time for me to acknowledge that not all friendships are meant to endure. Some relationships are harmful, and it’s perfectly acceptable to let go of them. Ending a toxic friendship doesn’t denote that you are a bad person — it’s a form of self-care.”_
— *Olivia*

Olivia’s perspective addresses the challenging yet necessary process of releasing toxic friendships. While ending a friendship can be hurtful, at times it’s crucial for maintaining our mental and emotional well-being.