This weekend, we watched the film Eighth Grade, which revolves around an eighth-grade girl navigating the challenges of middle school. (Have you seen it?) She resides with her father, and one night by the backyard fire pit, she asks him the poignant question, “Do I make you sad?” He discusses her motives for asking this and replies: “Being your dad fills me with happiness,” he states. “Loving you is effortless. I take pride in you so easily.”
“Loving you is effortless.” That line has stayed with me since I first viewed the movie seven years back. How lovely are those words? How valued would you feel if someone uttered that to you?
It prompted me to reflect on things I’ve said to my own kids — sentiments I’ve truly meant — and on the remarks I’ve received from my parents, as well as what I’ve heard other parents express to their children. Certainly, love can be shown in myriad ways — by giving your undivided attention, having your face light up at their sight, serving them a bowl of sliced fruit — and some individuals may feel awkward regarding direct compliments and sweet phrases, which is completely okay! However, if, like me, your love language leans towards words of affirmation, here are some sentiments you might share with your kids, if they resonate with you…
There’s nothing you could ever do or say to make me stop loving you.
Even when I’m upset, grumpy, or exhausted, or you’re upset, grumpy, or exhausted, I always love you.
Whether we’re together, apart, awake, or asleep, I always, always, always love you.
I love observing you at play.
I love hearing your thoughts.
I love you with my entire heart.
I cherish every age you’ve experienced, and it’s a treasure to witness your growth.
You possess good instincts.
Have faith in your instincts.
You can rely on yourself.
You can tackle difficult challenges. I’ve seen you overcome them before, and you can do it again.
You can weather the storm.
It’s incredibly brave to embrace your feelings; many people go through life without that ability.
I’m proud of you.
What you feel is completely normal; you are never, ever alone in your feelings.
Anything you can imagine, someone else has felt or done before.
You can share anything with me.
Nothing you say will surprise or shock me; I’ve encountered it all before.
I’ll never be disgusted or embarrassed by what you tell me; it’s all part of life.
I’m thrilled to be your mom.
Being your mom brings me joy.
You fill my days with happiness.
You are a wonderful person.
You are always on my mind.
I’m always here for you.
I’m on your team.
I love you.
My friend Erin, who has two children, shared this with me: “I may not have succeeded in teaching my kids Korean, but when N. was very young, I created a little lullaby in Korean that I would sing to him, featuring the phrase “많이, 많이 사랑해요” (which translates to ‘so much, so much, I love you’). Now that he’s older, I say those words, and he echoes them back, and it brings me joy that he knows that phrase by heart.”
Sobbbbbb.
What are your thoughts? How do you express love to your children? What’s your love language? I’d love to know. xoxo
P.S. How can we make our homes safe havens, and what are your specific love languages?
(Photo by Gurth Bramall/Unsplash.)
**25 Uplifting Phrases to Encourage Your Children**
As parents, the language we select can significantly influence our children’s development and self-worth. Positive reinforcement through encouraging phrases helps build confidence, resilience, and a feeling of security. Here are 25 uplifting phrases to support and elevate your children:
1. **”I have faith in you.”**
This statement reassures your child of your confidence in their abilities, motivating them to trust in themselves.
2. **”You can achieve incredible things.”**
Remind your child of their potential and the remarkable accomplishments they can reach with effort and perseverance.
3. **”I am proud of you.”**
Recognizing your child’s efforts and successes enhances their self-esteem and encourages them to keep striving for greatness.
4. **”You really put a lot of effort into that.”**
Concentrate on the hard work your child invests in their tasks, underscoring the importance of diligence and persistence.
5. **”Thank you for being yourself.”**
Communicate to your child that they are valued and loved for who they are, not merely for their actions.
6. **”I appreciate your assistance.”**
Acknowledge and show gratitude for your child’s contributions, nurturing a sense of responsibility and collaboration.
7. **”You make a positive impact.”**
Emphasize the positive effect your child has on others, reinforcing their sense of purpose and belonging.
8. **”I love witnessing your growth.”**
Celebrate your child’s development and progress, inspiring them to continue learning and evolving.
9. **”You managed that very well.”**
Commend your child’s skill in handling tough situations, reinforcing their confidence in problem-solving and emotional management.
10. **”Your thoughts matter.”**
Encourage your child to voice their opinions and insights, fostering creativity and critical thinking.
11. **”You are wonderfully creative.”**
Acknowledge your child’s imagination and uniqueness, inspiring them to explore and innovate.
12. **”I trust your judgment.”**
Show your child that you believe in their decision-making abilities, promoting autonomy.
13. **”You are a fantastic friend.”**
Reinforce the significance of kindness and empathy by acknowledging your child’s positive engagements with others.
14. **”You have a generous spirit.”**
Celebrate your child’s compassion and thoughtfulness, encouraging them to remain considerate and kind.
15. **”You are gaining a lot of knowledge.”**
Stress the value of growth and learning, motivating your child to take on new challenges.
16. **”You are courageous.”**
Recognize your child’s bravery in confronting fears or trying new endeavors, boosting their confidence to take risks.
17. **”You are capable of achieving this.”**
Provide reassurance and support when your child encounters a challenging task, strengthening their belief in their capabilities.
18. **”I admire your perseverance.”**
Acknowledge your child’s determination and tenacity, encouraging them to keep moving forward despite challenges.
19. **”You mean a lot to me.”**
Confirm your child’s importance in your life, enhancing their sense of security and self-esteem.
20. **”I love being around you.”**
Express enjoyment in your child’s company, nurturing a strong and loving bond.
21. **”You are full of possibilities.”**
Motivate your child to dream big and set high goals by reminding them of their unlimited potential.
22. **”You bring joy to my life.”**
Let your child know that they add happiness to your days, reinforcing their sense of worth and happiness.
23. **”I appreciate your curiosity.”**
Support your child’s desire to learn and explore, nurturing a lifelong passion for discovery.
24. **”You are attentive.”**
Recognize your child’s capability to listen and comprehend, reinforcing the importance of effective communication.
25. **”I’m always here to support you.”**
Provide steadfast reassurance, letting your child know they can depend on you in times of need.
Using these uplifting phrases regularly can significantly contribute to your child’s emotional health and foster a loving, supportive environment. Remember, the words you choose can empower your children to become confident, compassionate, and capable individuals.
