“If someone had asked me a decade ago to picture my life at this age, I would have envisioned having a husband, children, and a home in the suburbs,” reflects Catie, 40. “However, I’ve discovered immense happiness in my solo living. While many view living alone as merely a phase before moving on to something better, I don’t desire anything more.” Catie’s Manhattan residence (above) showcases a gallery wall, her favorite literature, and floral wallpaper that she didn’t need to persuade anyone else to appreciate. Below, Catie and 11 others reveal their experiences of solo living…
Katie’s patterned abode
On embracing individuality:
“Having the opportunity to unwind at home without anyone around to see me is such a comfort to my introverted nature.” — Katie, 34, who has lived solo for 13 years
“Living alone is an absolute blast! Slipping into pajamas and indulging in true crime shows right after I get home? Impromptu sleepovers with someone from Hinge? Being aware of exactly what’s in the fridge at all times? Absolutely!” — Natalie, 34, who has been on her own for four years
“Following a heartbreaking marriage and an even more painful divorce, starting over felt overwhelming. I was unsure of my identity or how I wanted to live my life. When do I prefer to go to bed? Am I a fan of incense? What shows do I want to binge? Having a free weekend used to fill me with anxiety. I felt uneasy even shopping alone at Target. Therefore, creating my own living space, decorating it, cooking, and learning to enjoy solitude became crucial. It’s the most thorough method I’ve found to discern what I genuinely want.” — Kaitlin, 44, has embraced solo living for eight years
“I adore shedding my clothes on a warm day and wandering around the house in the nude.” — Claire, 25, has been living independently for 1.5 years
On female empowerment:
Katie’s rustic home
“I live in a farmhouse from the 1870s, located two miles from the nearest paved road, completely off the grid; wild creatures traverse my yard day and night. What adds to its allure is that it’s the same house my mom moved into as a young woman before meeting my dad, creating a sense of continuity with a legacy of strong, independent women shaped by this household.” — Katie, 34, has lived alone for 13 years
“I grew up watching ‘The Mary Tyler Moore Show,’ which made the idea of a woman living solo always feel thrilling.” — Cheryl, 69, who has lived independently for 13 years
“When I think of living alone, I’m reminded of Diana Ross’s song ‘It’s My House.’” — Catie, 40, has embraced solo living for 11 years
On difficulties:
“Managing the rent on my own is challenging, especially in a metropolitan area, so I’m not saving as much as I’d prefer.” — Catie, 40, has been on her own for 11 years
“I used to think that cooking for one was difficult. Now, I proudly say, ‘I excel at nourishing myself.’ It means whipping up satisfying meals from the most random things in my pantry. There’s no one to scrutinize me!” — Allie, 40, has lived independently for eight years
“I don’t enjoy living alone when I’m unwell. Experiencing pain all by myself at night is the worst.” — Clara, 37, has lived solo for four years
Allie and Toby
On maintaining social connections:
“Having a pet provides me with companionship as I navigate my daily life. My dog, Toby, ensures I step outside four times daily, and my favorite moments are spent in the evening, lounging with him on the couch.” — Allie, 40, has lived independently for eight years
“Living by myself actually fosters a more social lifestyle, as I need to actively make plans to spend time with others. I’ll have friends over for dinner once or twice a week, and at least once monthly, a friend from out of town comes to stay for the weekend. After my last relationship, I moved closer to my family. Now, my twin sister lives next door, so we wave to each other from our kitchens.” — Clara, 37, who has been living solo for four years
Clara resides alone…in a home adjacent to her sister’s
On shifting from shared living:
“Following my divorce, I continued living in the house where my ex-husband and I had shared for 12 years, making the transition bittersweet. To claim the house as my own, I swapped out the art and replaced bedroom furniture. I’ve also been fortunate to discover a close-knit group of women that make living here delightful and leaving unthinkable.” — Cara, 41, has lived independently for two years
“Since my husband passed away in 2008, I’ve been living solo. It was tough at first — the absence of interaction when I arrived home from work felt like a gigantic void. But I now cherish the tranquility. I’ve been seeing someone for years, yet I have no desire to live with him or anyone else because I value my freedom.” — Margarita, 57, has lived alone for 16 years
“The primary reason I live solo: I will never again return home to find my roommate giving her boyfriend a pedicure on our living room couch.” — Jan, 45, has been living independently for 23 years
On personal style choices:
Sarah J.’s living area
“Eight years ago, I purchased a renovation project apartment. I frequently had to tick the ‘single, unmarried’ box on forms! The remodeling was quite the effort, but now my apartment truly reflects me, from the paint colors I selected to the antique mirrors I sourced. I design my home and my daily routine — realizing this is incredibly empowering.” — Sarah J., 38, has lived independently for eight years
“I just updated my bathroom and while my intention wasn’t to create a feminine pink space, I somehow ended up with a vibrant pink bathroom. I absolutely adore it.” — Jan, 45, has been living alone for 23 years
Cheryl at her residence
On essential life lessons:
“My late husband Kenny and I shared our lives for 30 years, and since his passing, I’ve lived independently. This home is where we raised our children. However, the ongoing upkeep of a house is relentless. While I enjoyed making these decisions together, I’ve grown incredibly confident in managing things alone. I’ve also established relationships with trusted individuals to handle repairs.” — Cheryl, 69, has lived alone for 13 years
“Whenever people ask me, ‘How did you learn to do that?’ I chuckle and respond, ‘Who else will?’ Recently, I had to replace the shower handle, and thanks to the wonders of Google and some trial and error, I accomplished it and felt quite accomplished.” — Catie, 40, has lived independently for 11 years
“The cabin I lived in after college was a tiny shoebox in the woods. On my first night, a mouse descended from the loft, locked eyes with me, and seemed to dare me to address it. The next day, I stocked up on mouse traps and even learned how to sand and refinish floors while living there. 1000/10 would highly recommend that all women experience living alone at some point!” — Katie, 34, has lived independently for 13 years
Do you currently live alone or have you in the past? What were the advantages and disadvantages?
P.S. 12 readers share their solo travel moments, and a vintage enthusiast discusses her dream home for solo living.
(Photos provided by the interview subjects, except for the portrait of Cheryl, which was captured by Sarah Petrarca.)
# 12 Women Share Their Experiences of Living Alone
Residing solo can be an empowering and transformative journey. For numerous women, it symbolizes independence, self-exploration, and personal evolution. Yet, it also presents its own set of hurdles, from feelings of isolation to financial burdens. To dive deeper into what solo living entails, we talked to 12 women who shared their distinctive experiences.
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## **1. Sarah, 29 – Embracing Freedom**
*”Living solo has provided me the liberty to make my own decisions without needing to compromise. I love being able to style my space precisely how I wish and establish my own routines. It has genuinely fostered my independence and self-reliance.”*
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## **2. Priya, 35 – Learning to Savor Solitude**
*”Initially, I struggled with the silence and longed for someone to chat with. But gradually, I learned to relish my own company. Now, I value the tranquility and have taken up hobbies like painting and reading that I previously didn’t have time for.”*
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## **3. Emily, 26 – Handling Finances Independently**
*”One of the main challenges of solo living is managing all expenses alone. Rent, utilities, groceries — it accumulates fast. However, it has also instilled financial discipline and reinforced the significance of budgeting.”*
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## **4. Maria, 40 – Feeling Safe and Secure**
*”Safety was my primary concern when I first moved into my own place. I invested in a reliable security system and made sure to get acquainted with my neighbors. Now, I feel far more secure and confident in my solo living.”*
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## **5. Jasmine, 31 – Combatting Loneliness**
*”There are moments when I feel lonely, especially during holidays or after a challenging workday. But I strive to maintain connections with friends and family through calls and visits. I’ve also joined local groups to socialize with new people.”*
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## **6. Olivia, 28 – Relishing Complete Freedom**
*”I adore the ability to do whatever I like without concerning myself with anyone else. Whether it’s cranking up the music, staying up late, or lounging around in pajamas all day, living alone offers me total freedom.”*
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## **7. Hannah, 33 – Becoming More Self-Sufficient**
*”Living alone has compelled me to acquire skills I never thought I’d need, like mending a dripping faucet or assembling furniture. It’s empowering to know that I can take care of myself independently.”*
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## **8. Aisha, 37 – Striking a Balance Between Work and Home Life**
*”When I lived with roommates, distractions were prevalent. Now that I live alone, I’ve established a better work-life equilibrium. I’ve cultivated a serene environment where I can concentrate on my career while also prioritizing self-care.”*
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## **9. Laura, 25 – Cooking for Myself**
*”Initially, preparing meals for just myself posed a challenge. I would rely on takeout, but I’ve since learned to meal prep and whip up simple, healthy dishes. Now, I genuinely enjoy experimenting in the kitchen.”*
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## **10. Zoe, 30 – Valuing the Simple Joys**
*”Living alone has heightened my appreciation for tiny pleasures, such as enjoying a quiet morning coffee or watching my favorite shows without interruptions. These small delights make this experience truly special.”*
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## **11. Megan, 42 – Navigating Societal Expectations**
*”Society often presumes that women should reside with family or a partner, especially as they age. I’ve encountered inquiries about why I live solo, but I’ve learned to cherish my choices and not let societal pressures sway me.”*
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## **12. Rachel, 27 – Cultivating Confidence**
*”Living alone has significantly improved my confidence in unforeseen ways. I’ve learned to trust my instincts, independently make decisions, and enjoy my own presence. It’s been a journey of self-discovery and empowerment.”*
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## **Final Reflections**
Living independently is a unique journey filled with both joys and difficulties. For these 12 women, it has been a path of self-exploration, independence, and personal growth. Although it may not always be straightforward, many find that the advantages significantly outweigh the challenges. Whether it’s acquiring new skills, embracing solitude, or enjoying absolute freedom, living alone can be an immensely rewarding venture.
Would you consider living alone? Feel free to share your thoughts and experiences in the comments!
