Nowadays, I think you’ll agree, grasping the fact that there are countless ways to lead a fulfilling life is more crucial than ever. Individuals hail from diverse backgrounds, cultures, beliefs, and viewpoints, and, naturally, just because something might seem strange or perplexing to a specific person or community doesn’t imply it isn’t beautiful, genuine, or deserving. To support this idea, we are re-sharing some previous posts and reaffirming our commitment to elevate diverse viewpoints that may not always receive widespread attention. We remain firmly in solidarity with our transgender friends and readers. Here’s a 2021 article showcasing three children discussing their gender identities.
We connected with three remarkable transgender kids. They share their favorite pastimes, their experiences transitioning at school, and the advice they would extend to other children…
Violet, she/her, age 13
Can you share about yourself?
I’m 13 years old, nearing 14. I’m currently in eighth grade.
When did you start your transition at school?
At the end of second grade, entering third grade. However, I was involved with the girls’ group since kindergarten. Everyone was aware I wasn’t a boy. So, my transition wasn’t shocking; everyone was young and thought, this is cool. ‘This is strange’ came later.
What occurred next?
By fifth, sixth, and seventh grade, some would say, ‘You’re still a boy, you know that, right?’ I’ve faced instances where slurs were directed at me, but those were rare. All my friends were supportive, as were many others who weren’t my friends. There will always be kids who don’t comprehend or don’t accept it, which is unfortunate, but you must cope with it.
I’m about to begin high school. I’m changing to a new school, allowing me to start fresh and remain anonymous. This will be really beneficial for me. I desire a typical school experience that isn’t necessarily tied to who I was before. The kids at my current school have known me since preschool, so they know my entire history. I want to control who I inform and how that unfolds.
How did you select the name Violet?
My mom provided a list of names and told me to choose one. I always liked the name Violet because she mentioned it would have been my name if I had been born female. I found the name appealing and distinct.
How have your parents, siblings, or others supported you?
Even before I came out, I felt reassured that I would be loved unconditionally by my parents and siblings no matter what. I have a twin brother who attends the same school as I do, and he always defends me. He tells others to speak to him if they have an issue. He’s my support. My younger brother has known me only as Violet, so it feels normal to him, which I am thankful for.
What do you wish people understood about being trans?
The primary point is that it’s not a choice. Coming out is a choice, but being trans isn’t a decision. It’s not like one day I woke up and decided to be a girl. I HAVE always known I wasn’t a boy. It’s not that I wanted to be a girl; I AM a girl. I simply needed to articulate that.
What was your experience when you were very young?
I didn’t fully grasp the concept of gender, but about four years before I came out, during pre-K’s first day, my mom allowed me to choose my outfit. I always wore pink and expressed myself. Later, in elementary school, there was mandatory swimming, and one day, some boys were misbehaving in the locker room. I was so self-conscious about my body that I would change in stalls, avoiding the situation. Eventually, the swim teacher came in and reprimanded them. After that, our teacher said, ‘Can all the boys stay behind? All the girls can head to the yard.’ I thought, well, I’m not a boy, so why am I here? It was frustrating.
Are there instances where people’s words or actions are unhelpful?
Some folks think it’s okay to ask, Do you have a penis? before they even know my name! That’s highly inappropriate and quite an awkward question. You shouldn’t approach someone without knowing their name and ask, hey, what’s in your pants? That always makes me uncomfortable. I also dislike when people try to be excessively supportive or ensure I’m okay with everything. Even when people discuss it positively, I become embarrassed or flushed. I believe there should be a balance of respect regarding people’s pronouns and personal space, without asking, how do you feel about this? Can I call you this? Those are excellent questions to pose, but sometimes I’m just aiming to be treated as a person.
Has anything surprised you?
Even when you anticipate certain reactions, you can still be caught off guard. For instance, as I was about to enter the girls’ restroom, I overheard someone remark, ‘Why is he going into that bathroom? He’s such a perv.’ I thought, okay… this will happen at some point but it’s still shocking when someone makes hurtful or rude comments.
What advice would you give a younger transgender child?
Regardless of whether some individuals don’t grasp it, at day’s end, everything will be alright. Whatever you’re feeling is entirely normal. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. Live your life. Everyone is concerned about what others think, but when you start caring less, life opens up. That’s truly empowering, in my opinion.
Also, find a community if possible. For many years, I’ve attended a sleep-away camp exclusively for trans kids. It has been an incredible experience. It’s allowed me to connect with others who share similar experiences and guaranteed that I could have fun and enjoy a regular childhood — and I feel a profound bond with everyone there. It feels safe. Being trans there is customary. I’m not alone. That’s truly amazing.
Zack, he/him, age 9
What hobbies are you interested in right now?
I absolutely love rock climbing. I enjoy painting as well. Sometimes I cook dinner for my family, and I always whip up a dessert.
Oh, like what?
I take a cookie and pile on a lot of chocolate. I once constructed a chocolate Eiffel Tower. I layered a cookie with Nutella and banana, then another layer of Nutella, and added York Peppermint Patty Minis and top it off with chocolate chips.
What’s your favorite animal?
I’m fond of snakes and tarantulas. I haven’t encountered a tarantula yet, but I hope to.
What do you aspire to be when you grow up?
At school, we have a daily question, and my teacher recently posed that one! I said I wanted to be a food inventor, rock climber, or DJ.
Do you recall when you realized you were a boy?
I had that realization one night just before bed, and it suddenly dawned on me. I shouted that I was a boy. My mom and sister were present, and a friend was in the bathroom brushing her teeth. I’m not certain where Dad was.
How did it feel to proclaim that?
Good.
What’s the best part of being recognized as a boy?
When people address me or reference me, they don’t use ‘she’ or ‘girl.’
How did you pick the name Zack?
Initially, it was supposed to be Jacob, inspired by the book The Pants Project. It tells the story of a girl attending a new school with a uniform and having to wear a skirt, which she despised, and a boy named Jacob who had a condition affecting his legs. They befriended each other, and she revealed her trans status to him, leading to a petition where the boys wore skirts to school, and she donned the boys’ outfit. I’m not sure why I chose Zack; it just came to me.
When did you transition at school?
Third grade. Everyone was supportive. There is one teacher who struggles to understand, though. She says she tries, but it’s evident she doesn’t fully grasp. I was just in class when she called on me and exclaimed, ‘She’s had her hand up for a long time,’ and I attempted to inform her I was a boy, and she shushed me.
What have your parents, sister, or others done that has been beneficial?
My mom stated she would email the teacher about it, which is helpful.
What do you wish people understood about being trans?
Some folks believe there’s something wrong, thinking it’s merely a phase, but only you have the authority to determine that.
What would you advise a younger child who is coming to terms with their trans identity?
If someone tells you it’s just a phase, disregard it. It’s not their decision. Don’t heed those individuals who claim you’re different or weird. Well, if they do, consider it a compliment.
Aya, she/her, age 9
Tell me about yourself!
I love doing Rainbow Loom — I can create bracelets and chokers out of rubber bands. I ride my bike a lot. I enjoy playing Minecraft and Dungeons & Dragons.
What are your favorite foods?
Oreos — just not the chocolate ones; I prefer the vanilla kind. I also love fries, cinnamon rolls, and pasta.
Any foods you dislike?
Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, and I think chocolate. At a backyard event once, someone brought croissants, and I asked if it was a chocolate croissant. She replied she didn’t think so, so I tried it, only to discover it contained chocolate.
Do you remember when you realized you were a girl?
I always knew because before I informed Mommy and Daddy, I was frequently in dresses. For Halloween, I dressed as Elsa from Frozen. Another time, we all were witches for Halloween, with different costumes for boys, and Dad distinctly chose the boy costume, but I wanted to wear what my sister Emmie had.
How did you tell your parents?
One evening, my sister mentioned, ‘So… Mommy’s a girl, I’m a girl, Daddy’s a boy, and you’re a boy.’ But I immediately responded, ‘No, no, I’m a girl.’ That was my first instance, but there was another. Driving back from Mommy’s school, she discussed various terms like transgender, and when she described it, I thought, that’s me. I was five.
How did you choose the name Aya?
Mommy’s dad’s name began with A, so it needed to have an A. I really liked Annabel, but Mommy and Daddy weren’t fond of it. Daddy proposed Aya. I now prefer Aya, but I still name things Annabel. I have a stuffed animal named Annabel. Moreover, for a historical fiction journal project, I named the main character Annabel.
How did your transition at school occur?
It initiated when I was five, but I officially transitioned at school in second grade. It took years. In second grade, I began wearing dresses. By the end of second grade, I started using they/them pronouns. In third grade, I shifted to she/her pronouns. In fourth grade, I changed my name to Aya.
How were those changes perceived?
Everyone was welcoming. There were no negative reactions such as, no, that’s wrong. I recall one instance — I was playing with a boy at school who identified as a boy but wore what some might call girl clothes. Another boy remarked, ‘Why are you both wearing girl clothes?’ I replied, ‘What’s girl clothes?’ even though I understood what he meant. He responded, ‘That’s what you’re wearing.’ I curiously queried, ‘What am I wearing?’
I also confided in Maria, my teacher, during second grade. The first day I wore dresses was intended for a Monday, but it coincided with April Fools’ Day, and Mommy worried people might assume it was a joke. Yet it turned out great; nobody thought it was an April Fools’ prank. My teacher Maria also read a book I brought called I Am Jazz.
Why did you pick that book?
It’s about a transgender girl, and I thought it would help everyone understand what it represents.
Are there any other books or TV shows featuring transgender characters that you enjoy?
I like numerous picture books, such as Born Ready, Introducing Teddy, Bunnybear, Julian Is a Mermaid, When Aidan Became a Brother, Neither, 10,000 Dresses, and Pink Is for Boys. The chapter book George is also one of my favorites. Additionally, I enjoy the TV show I Am Jazz. A fun fact: While watching an episode of Mo Willems about drawing, he shared that his child is transgender — the one from Knuffle Bunny. Trixie is now Trix!
What support have your parents or others provided that’s been advantageous?
They’ve been incredibly supportive. My mom informed all our relatives — ‘Aya is transgender and is changing her pronouns and everything else.’ Whenever we visited a friend who wasn’t aware, Mommy would quietly ask, ‘Do you want to share, or should I?’ I always opted for her to explain. Everyone tends to have numerous questions, but when playing with them, there was no interrogation like, Soooo… why are you doing this? Why are you in a dress?
What advice would you give a younger child discovering they are trans?
Don’t let anyone persuade you that you shouldn’t be transgender. Prior to informing Mommy and Daddy, it consistently felt incorrect. Wearing boy clothes and presenting as a boy felt wrong.
What do you wish more people understood about being transgender?
I hope everyone realizes it’s not different from anyone else. It’s unique and special, but ultimately, you’re the same as everyone. I’m a girl. No big deal.
Thank you, Violet, Zack, and Aya! Learn more about LGBTQ youth at the Trevor Project.
P.S. A transgender advocate’s beauty regimen, and a vibrant Seattle home that embraces acceptance.
(Photo by Hilary Walker/Stocksy. Some names have been altered to ensure privacy.)
**Personal Stories: Three Transgender Children Share Their Journeys**
In recent times, the visibility of transgender individuals has significantly increased, shedding light on the distinct challenges and victories they encounter. Among the most compelling narratives in this discourse are those of transgender children—young individuals navigating their identities in a society still learning how to support them. In this piece, we present the personal experiences of three transgender children, each offering a poignant insight into their lives, struggles, and aspirations for the future.
—
### 1. **Avery, Age 10 – Embracing Her Authentic Self**
Avery, an enthusiastic and bright 10-year-old from Oregon, began to articulate her gender identity when she was merely four. “She always gravitated toward dresses and dolls,” her mother, Lisa, recalls. “Initially, we thought it was a phase, but over time it became evident that Avery had something crucial to convey to us.”
After discussions with pediatricians and a child psychologist, Avery’s parents supported her social transition when she was six. She began using her chosen name and pronouns at school, where teachers and classmates became educated about gender identity. “It was daunting at first,” Avery confesses. “But once people started calling me Avery and referring to me as ‘she,’ I felt I could finally express my true self.”
Today, Avery flourishes. She is an honor roll student, plays the violin, and dreams of becoming a veterinarian. “I want people to understand that being transgender isn’t odd or wrong,” she states. “It’s simply who I am.”
—
### 2. **Jaden, Age 13 – Gaining Strength Through Advocacy**
Jaden, a 13-year-old transgender boy from Texas, experienced a more challenging journey. Born female, Jaden dealt with anxiety and depression before coming out at the age of 11. “I lacked the vocabulary to express my feelings,” he shares. “I just knew something felt misaligned.”
When Jaden ultimately disclosed to his parents that he was a boy, they were initially puzzled but committed to learning. “We didn’t grasp everything, but we knew we loved our child,” his father, Marcus, avows. With help from a local LGBTQ+ support group, Jaden’s family began the process of affirming his identity.
However, school provided its challenges. Jaden faced bullying and resistance from administrators when he requested permission to use the boys’ restroom. Rather than retreating, he turned into an advocate, speaking at school board meetings and aiding in the creation of a peer support group for LGBTQ+ students.
“Being transgender isn’t simple, especially in an environment where acceptance isn’t guaranteed,” Jaden remarks. “But I’ve come to realize that my voice is significant. I aspire to improve circumstances for children like myself.”
—
### 3. **Maya, Age 8 – Supported Right from the Start**
Maya’s journey commenced earlier than most. By the age of three, she firmly asserted that she was a girl. Her parents, initially uncertain, looked for guidance from medical experts and gender specialists. “We were advised to listen to our child and follow her lead,” recounts her mother, Priya.
By age five, Maya had undergone a social transition, and her family collaborated effectively with her elementary school to cultivate a supportive atmosphere. “The school was extraordinary,” Priya states. “They updated records, trained staff, and educated students in age-appropriate manners.”
Now eight, Maya is a joyful and confident child who delights in painting and gymnastics. “I’m just like any other girl,” she beams. “I adore sparkles and my cat, Luna.”
Her parents stress the significance of early support. “When a child’s identity is affirmed, it transforms everything,” Priya states. “Maya exemplifies that.”
—
### The Significance of Listening and Support
The narratives of Avery, Jaden, and Maya underscore the diverse experiences of transgender children. While each journey is distinct, several common threads appear: the necessity of supportive families, informed schools, and accessible affirmative healthcare.
Experts concur that early affirmation can markedly enhance mental health outcomes for transgender youth. According to a study published in *Pediatrics* in 2022, transgender children who receive support for their gender identity experience levels of depression and anxiety comparable to their cisgender peers.
Nevertheless, obstacles persist. Transgender youth frequently confront discrimination, insufficient access to appropriate medical care, and legislative attempts to restrict their rights. Advocates emphasize the need for continuous education, policy reform, and community support.
—
### Moving Ahead
As society continues to advance in its comprehension of gender, the perspectives of transgender children hold greater significance than ever. Their stories serve as a reminder that identity is profoundly personal and that every child deserves to mature in an environment where they feel safe, respected, and cherished.
“I merely wish for people to see me for who I am,” Jaden shares. “Not as an issue, but as a person.”
